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1. |
W.G.W.A.G. Prelude
01:09
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I wanna be behind my best friends’ eyes
I wanna be behind an artist’s hand
I wanna notice the shape of my mouth and the way that I stand
I wanna see just how they draw my hair
I wanna see the colour of my eyes
I wanna see which expression I’d have, but I don’t think I’d be surprised
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2. |
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Two pockets empty, he ascends the stairs
The back of his neck stained pink
The back of his jacket’s got some pink on it too
He says he needs less time to think
I wanna be behind my best friends’ eyes
I wanna be behind an artist’s hand
I wanna notice the shape of my mouth and the way that I stand
I wanna make it in an online space
I wanna see headcanons made of me
If you were one of these trending faces, tag yourself which one you’d be
He squints his eyes and asks, after confessing (I could see myself as an animal)
That he is not who he purports to be (I could dress myself up as an alien)
“Who’s that copying my every movement?” (I shouldn’t be concerned what they think)
“I don’t like the way he looks at me” (I shouldn’t be concerned, but here we are)
What lies in the gilded frame?
Oh, what a surprise
Is it anything like what is seen
In other people’s eyes?
I wanna be behind my best friends’ eyes
I wanna be behind an artist’s hand
I wanna see which hot new aesthetic I can make my own personal brand
I wanna hear every conversation
Had about me by the people I hate
I wanna hear a verbal picture of my every poor trait
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3. |
John Daniel
04:02
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If I could speak my mind
I would better articulate the things I need
But I’m not that advanced, I’m only an ape
If you prick me, do I not bleed?
I feel like a new John Daniel
A King Kong man in a world evolved beyond me,
A primitive thing at home in the grass
With a new world’s weight levelled upon me
(John Daniel)
I’m only walking on my hind legs in a suit
(John Daniel)
A raison d’etre’s as good as a piece of fruit
I’m only chasing simple pleasures with a simple mind
I’m just a simple being of a simple kind
“I am flowers, animals”
Are the thoughts that escape my grunting mouth and gesturing hands
“Man stupid! Man stupid!”
I huff out my nose to anyone who can understand
You sign me a question like “Are we not men?”
And I wouldn’t even know where to start
All levels but physical, I’m an old world beast
With a Brassau penchant for art
(John Daniel)
I’m only walking on my hind legs in a suit
(John Daniel)
A raison d’etre’s as good as a piece of fruit
I’m only chasing simple pleasures with a simple mind
I’m just a simple being of a simple kind
He makes his bed and drinks his tea
Just like a real homo sapiens
He plays with the kids and he goes to school
Just like a real hairless ape, he yearns
He looks in the mirror and copies his friend
Maybe he knows as much as you can know
More than can be seen with a prehensile mind
But he’s still looking for a natural home
He makes his bed and drinks his tea
Just like a real homo sapiens
He plays with the kids and he goes to school
Just like a real hairless ape, he yearns
He looks in the mirror and copies his friend
Maybe he knows as much as you can know
More than can be seen with a prehensile mind
But he’s still looking for a natural home
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4. |
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People think they’re better than me
Just because they’re better than me
No, no, I know that doesn’t make any sense
I’m just not that blessed with self-confidence
When they mention their friends to me
I’m overcome by jealousy
I don’t know how to articulate their virtues and seek
A friend’s approval without my tongue in my cheek
And I know, I know that’s we’re all equal
But that’s not the way I feel
I can’t cheer for your victories
Again envy’s leaving me
Hanging on for dear life on the precipice
Between self-awareness and self-consciousness
I don’t wanna tell you the truth
I just wanna be happy for you
Why do I think you think you’re too good?
Why can’t I be there as a friend should?
And I know, I know that’s we’re all equal
But that’s not the way I feel
I can’t tell you how I feel
I can’t tell you how to do so too
I can’t tell you who I am
I can’t tell you how I feel about you
I can feel the thinker on my left
I think the feeler’s on my right
The warp drive busted, broken open
The captain twisted, out of control
I know, I know
I’m playing tricks on myself
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5. |
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Don’t give me that same old friendly smile
Don’t you know I hate it when you get so damn polite?
Don’t dangle anything before my eyes
Don’t you know I hate it when I know what’s coming my way?
I wonder what it takes to be
So approachable and do I have enough?
How do they make it look so easy?
Who decided it should have to be so tough?
Just give me one thing that I can say I haven’t broke
What’s with all these people laughing at each other’s jokes?
In busy rooms, I disperse into the air
In a corner, I wait for walls to swallow me whole
I shrink and fade cause I’m a through-the-cracks slipper
And I think by now I’m a seasoned crack shipper
In character, I stay out of control
Sit down, and have another one on me
Do what you want, just don’t say that it’s time to leave
Cause when the night’s grown old, the only thing there’s left to be
Is a walk-on who walks off just as easily
Give me one thing that I can say I haven’t broke
What’s with all these people laughing at each other’s jokes?
Give me someone that can turn my worries calm
What’s with all these people crying in each other’s arms?
How about I queue another song? Don’t you know this one?
Remember I always take requests
Please take something from the fridge while I’m gone
I just need five or ten to rest
How about another episode of my favourite show?
I’ve got the TV all set up -
Hey, 20 minutes I don’t make conversation
Is 20 minutes that I don’t slip up
Give me one thing that I can say I haven’t broke
What’s with all these people laughing at each other’s jokes?
Give me someone that can turn eternal worries calm
What’s with all these people crying in each other’s arms?
I can be there when you need company for a smoke
And I can strain myself to have you laugh at my jokes
But I am not endowed by God’s grace with charm
To be the one when you cry in a good friend’s arms
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6. |
Damn Robot
03:59
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(It’s ok! You’ll get used to it.)
(Ugh, I’m gonna be sick…)
(Stop complaining! You’re a boy, you know.)
It’s not my distance from home
That makes me feel a life slipping through me
It’s a big metal unknown
And an even bigger responsibility
Another roadside breakdown
But the engine was working fine
Every failure a lesson learned
But I am not a lesson, and there is no next time
I was like a foetus on the floor
Is this what Eva was an allegory for?
I won’t get in the damn robot anymore
In Thursday’s unhappy dreams
Monsters were wrecking tearing city streets
Drinking blood and billowing smoke
Trapping kids under their metal feet
And I was up in the machine (And I was up six hundred in the sky)
I could feel their eyes all on me (I could feel the burning of their eyes)
My sight blurred in the cockpit (I couldn’t do it, I couldn’t tell you why)
“It isn’t fair!” I said, “What do you want from me?” (I didn’t fail, I failed to even try)
There’s boys with their toys and then there’s me
To onlookers in the vicinity
The damn robot was a measure of my masculinity (Oh, damn robot)
I stood in the hallway alone
I had the note, tear stained on my chest
“Whatever happens, we’re proud of you,
And we know you did your best”
But I’m scared (I couldn’t do it, I couldn’t tell you why)
What if I did (I didn’t fail, I failed to even try)
And it wasn’t enough? (I couldn’t do it, I couldn’t tell you why)
And it was all too much (I didn’t fail, I failed to even try)
I was like a foetus on the floor
Is this what Eva was an allegory for?
I won’t get in the damn robot anymore (Oh, damn robot)
The TV spoke to me in code
I didn’t need more than the first episode
The damn robot can go and hit the road (Oh, damn robot)
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7. |
Roll, Elf, Roll
02:23
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With my hands on the bloodstone, I start singing a melody
Pointed posted ears are a-transmogrifyin’ a better me
The brown haired human is calling out “I don’t wanna die!”
But the ruddy-head elf assures him he’s in for a nice surprise
Roll, elf, roll and may luck be on your side
Roll, elf, roll and may luck be on thy side
Roll, elf, roll and may luck be on your side
Roll, elf, roll and may luck be on thy side
Touch the golden earth and see what you can find
Roll, elf, roll and may luck be on thy side
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8. |
Roleplayer
04:08
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Vicarious living through fictional characters
“I love you” said my alien boyfriend
I think by now I’m more persona than person
And I know now that things don’t change unless they worsen
I feel validated when they call me Dave Strider
Cause I’m not much of a kappa kinnie these days
Once upon a time I refused to be a faker
But I think by now I’m a seasoned roleplayer
My little life is sacred
But it’s been wasted
Trying to write a better one
My little life is special
But its potential
Is wasted trying to be anyone
In the middle of the act, enter stage-side
A clumsy self-insert who’s looking for something
Outside the world to which he find he’s indentured
I’d take adventure every day any day over everyday adventure
Maybe I should wait, maybe it’s not too late
To find myself inexplicably in Narnia
But even outside the closet doors that strangle me
I live a life trapped by its own reality
My little life is sacred
But it’s been wasted
Trying to write a better one
My little life is special
But its potential
Is wasted trying to share it with anyone
Across the multiverse
On the other side of a black hole
There’s a home
Away from home
In the 20th dimension
In a parallel friendship circle
I’m home
Away from home
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9. |
Upon Reflection
04:11
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For a time
I avoided eye contact with mirrors
Such things are bad for my health
I was willing
To smash up my security deposit
Just for a break from myself
I think, upon reflection, I’m still scared
I think upon reflection - I could end the sentence there
In the hall
I’m being chased by what I’m chasing
Between the ape-like being and the elf
Like the ouroboros
With its tail between its legs
I’m always doubling back on myself
I think, upon reflection, I’m still scared
I think upon reflection - I could end the sentence there
And I was left unfulfilled
I didn’t do shit cause I had no reason to
Like a dog/log without its bark
Directionless like Twin Peaks Season 2
It’s just some character nobody liked
Riding to some distant subplot on a shitty motorbike
When it was all over for good
It ended with a smashed up bathroom mirror, as I knew it would
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10. |
Still Waters [outro]
01:26
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kappa Leeds, UK
kappa, f.k.a. Kappa
"Quit the Neighbourhood!" out now
kappa recommends:
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scrappy diy indie rock, has had untold levels of influence on me. for fans of any good music. best song: either sun dogs or pulling teeth.
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